Last Blog...WHAT?

          Already Dead Week and I have no idea how we got here so fast.
         Freshman year, which seems like it was just yesterday, I felt like my peer mentors were so much older, wiser, and really had this whole college thing figured out. I also remember thinking, I want to be one of them someday! And while we may not have it all put together all the time, I definitely am feeling like our group as a whole will be great peer mentors this fall; these freshmen are lucky to have us. ;)
              I think hearing from the panel last week made everything a lot more real, but it was good to hear more about Brooke and Josh's experience their first time around as well as Megan's two experience. The biggest thing that I took away from the panel was getting to hear about some of the issues that arise. I was surprised to hear that there were many that dealt with butting heads with their co-leader. I'm definitely like Megan where I avoid conflict and try my best to compromise at any and all costs so I'm hoping my flexibility will help me avoid any problems like that. However, even with some issues, it seemed as though everyone ended up enjoying each of their co-leaders and I'm sure I will be the same. I'd love to work with any of you this fall!
            Another thing that I liked hearing about was how each of them went about planning their lesson plans because they were all so different. I now have three ideas that my co-leader and I can decide to use or maybe collaborate a couple of them together. I really liked the idea of always finishing the lesson plan that was due for the week and coming up with a backbone, at the least, for the week after. I think that will be great for when there are weeks when one, or both, of us are absolutely swamped with other things. I could also see myself using Josh and his partner's system and leaving it more opened ended in terms of time. While there are some things that I can do under pressure, I learned this fall that lesson planning is not one of them! I started mine early on which allowed me to randomly think of activities or new information that I had left out.
       All and all, this semester has been a blast! I definitely got a lot out of it, including lots of new friends! I'm really looking forward to the fall and meeting the students of my group, but right now, all I can think of is finding out who I get to work with! Hurry up Thursday!

Peer Mentor in Higher Education

        How is it already the end of the semester?! Each of us has done a fantastic job of leading a section out of Students Helping Students and last week was no exception. I thought the discussion of chapter 11 was a great way to wrap up the book and provide some final information to think about before hearing from the panel of former Hixson Peer Mentors this week.

      First off, the discussion of our interactions with our former peer mentors, whether it was our CAs, our learning community peer mentors, or our Hixson peer mentors, was insightful in hearing what went well with them and what did not. For the most part, I had great peer mentors my freshman year between my Hixson peer mentors and my learning community peer mentors. My Hixson Peer Mentors were very professional and I always felt like they were a great example to follow and knew a lot about the Iowa State community. One of my learning community peer mentors was particularly good at making herself available to me. We e-mailed often and even had a one-on-one meeting to discuss summer jobs. She even gave me the contact information for one of her bosses, knowing they would be looking to hire that summer. I credit them for helping me survive the big transition between high school and college. It's nice to get to see them on campus every once in awhile and let them know that things are still going good.

       On the other hand, I'm not going to say my CA was a horrible peer mentor, but he definitely didn't establish the most professional relationship with a lot of his residents. I was friends with him and thought of him as just that, a friend, not exactly someone I would go to for help if I had a concern. I think this goes to show how important it is to maintain that professional-level relationship with our students and not just become a part of their circle of friends. 

     My favorite part of the class, however, was going around to each peer mentor and having them mention one thing that we would like to provide for our students or one thing that we would like to get out of our experience as a peer mentor. Some of the things were already mentioned in my mission statement, but there were new ones that I hadn't thought of that I thought were perfect, like the "creation of a small family." My section became very close early on with the help of the retreat during the first weekend. We would often get lunch or dinner together before classes. I still talk to a few of them regularly and see a lot of them on campus! 

        One of the main reasons that I decided to come to be a peer mentor was because I had such a positive experience my freshman year and I was missing the participation and connections to the Hixson Program. As peer mentors, I think we've already began to connect with one another and I foresee that continuing through the fall as we help each other become the best peer mentors for our own students. 

      I'm looking forward to Thursday to see which one of you I get to work with more this fall! 

Ethics for Good Practice

         I really enjoyed last week's discussion and think it might be one of the most important of the whole semester. Each of the 12 principles that the book outlined are critical for our success as peer mentors. I think the most important thing for each of us to remember is that when we signed up to be peer mentors, we signed on to being a positive role model for our students and should always present ourselves in that way, even if this means that a Friday night out needs to be cut short because you spot one of your students at a house party that you're at as well.
        Some of the issues that we talked about seemed a little more out there than others, but it was nice to know in advance that some wild things do happen. I think it would be difficult to work in some of the conditions that we talked about like having a student hit on you or having students within your section begin relationships, but I think they can all be worked through if we as peer mentors establish a level of profession at the beginning of the semester. This includes remaining unbiased, not having favorites, and keeping things confidential.
        My favorite thing that was said during class was, "Up, not Out" in regards to the confidentiality policy. While we were going through some of the situations, I was a little confused on what our job was, but that summed it up great. When I was a freshman I would have been comfortable telling my peer mentors anything knowing that the only people they would talk to, if needed, would be people above them who would only be there to help more.
       Going back to the level of profession that I talked about earlier, I think it's important that we also own up to our own mistakes if a situation should ever arise. It would be really embarrassing and I pray that I am never in a situation where I would need to, but I would talk to my students and first of all, apologize for not portraying myself as a positive role model. Sure, it would be really awkward like we all said in class, but I think it would serve as a learning opportunity for the students as well as for myself. I really don't anticipate this happening, but at least now I've thought about what I would do if it did.
       Finally, I'm really glad we made that pledge for quality service, great activity Liz and Kim! I thought we came up with a great list and it will be a good reminder to have this fall if our ethics are ever tested. As peer mentors, we're not here to tell our students what to do and what not to do; we're not their parents. We just need to do our best to be as ethical and smart as we can because as they say actions speak louder than words!

How to Use Campus Resources

          I choose to practice my referral of campus resources on Timothy's case of not getting along with his roommate because that is a situation that I don't have experience with. I loved my roommate and like in the scenario, still talk to her often. However, I remember by the end of the year last year that there were many people who weren't so crazy about their's showing this is an all too common issue with freshmen and their dorm mates.
       First off, I decided that this a situation with moderate severity. It definitely needs to get taken care of before things get too serious, or crazy as Timothy would say, but no one's life is at stake so taking a little time to think things over won't hurt anyone. Then, I would move on to talking to Timothy more about this problem and asking questions. The two statements that he made, "he's crazy," and "everyone has noticed the tension", isn't enough information to figure out what the real problem is. So my first questions would be based around figuring out what is really going on. Is it something like the roommate is a slob/neat freak or does he come in too late at night or is mean and yell at Timothy? Is he breaking one of their mutual agreements on their roommate contract? Digging into the issue is crucial! I would also ask Timothy what he thought his options were and what he has thought about doing. Sometimes just talking things out like this can be enough to solve the issue if the student realizes that the issue really isn't all that bad.
     However, if it is something serious and Timothy feels like he really does need more help, I would first upfront tell him that I don't know everything about changing roommates or dorms and that that is something that his Community Adviser or Hall Director would be best at. Like we talked about in class, taking this step could be difficult so I would encourage this action by talking about how helpful and friendly my CA was when I lived in the dorms. Additionally, I would remind him that he is not the only person to ever have an issue with a roommate and the CA's are well equipped to assist in solving them. I don't think that it would be necessary for me to personalize this situation unless I happened to know their CA or hall director; I definitely think this is one of those times that we can't walk them to their CA's door or go and yell at their roommate.
     Finally, to followup on this situation, I would try and pull Timothy aside after class or shoot him an e-mail to see if he has done anything about the situation and if yes, find out if that helped or not, and then help him talk through what the next steps need to be if it's not resolved.

Academic Success

       I hope everyone had a great spring break! I know I loved every minute of sitting on my couch watching March Madness with my family, but now I'm regretting not touching my homework for a week...yikes! Funny that I have to write about academic success now, huh?
       Anyways, I loved the discussion that we had that last class about thinking about a time that you thought about leaving Iowa State and what made you stay. I could have sworn I was the only crazy person who thought about it and was a little timid to start talking about it until my partner just let it all out. And I was like, "wait you too?" Always good to know you're not alone!
     My main reason was due mostly to homesickness first semester. Because the University of Iowa is so close to my hometown, a ton of my friends as well as my sisters, went there. It was always where I had wanted to go too, until I found out that I was restricted to ISU due to my major. Only two other girls from my graduating class came to ISU and there's maybe 10-15 others from Durant here now. On top of that, as much as I loved my roommate last year, she was barely ever around first semester because she had an upperclassman boyfriend who had an apartment. It would have been really easy for me to have said, "yep, I don't like it here, I'm transferring at semester," and trust me, I thought about it a lot.
     Tying this back to what what we discussed in lecture, I am definitely motivated internally. Everything that I work for, I know that I'm only doing to better myself and increase my chances at getting an internship and job in the future, whether that means staying in on a Friday night to study or working 40 hours weeks in the summer. I never said it was the most fun thing in the world, but the hard work has more than paid off through my first two years of college.
     Now back to why I stayed at ISU. Mostly, I think it was because of the Hixson Scholarship. I knew how lucky I was to have this much financial help and that I wouldn't get that if I transferred. Additionally, I still loved my major and wasn't ready to give that up either. So I basically told myself to suck it up for at least one more semester and then see. Thank God I did! I had the best end to first semester, finally got to know more people on my floor, connected with my roommate, and ended up meeting my best friends.
     I think this area of homesickness/wanting to transfer is where I will be most able to help the freshman next year because I'm not afraid to admit that I went through it now; it's all too common. The most difficult thing will be getting the students to open up to me, unlike myself. The only people I ever told was my sister and my parents! It wasn't because I didn't trust my peer mentors or anything like that, I'm just not the type of person who talks things out with people because ultimately, I'm going to make the decision no matter what anyone tells me. If I have students like this, I will remind them I'm not ever going to try to make the decision for them, but I will help them find what the real issue is and point them in the direction of resources to help solve any little bit of it.

ISCORE

          Last Friday, I was able to attend two sessions at the Iowa State Conference on Race and Ethnicity. They were Student Leadership and the College Experience: Creating Opportunities for Growth and Success and -ISM's Explored Through the Eyes of George Washington Carver Students. Although both of these presentations were vastly different, the one thing that stuck out to me was how these students were both in programs, similar to the Hixson Opportunity Awards program, that I have never heard of. The first presentation was led by three women from the Student Support Services program, which is strictly for first generation students, and then the second, of course, was facilitated by the George Washington Carver students, who are selected out of high school if they are of a minority ethnicity.
           The first session was a lot different than what I expected. It turned out to be three women telling us about their lives, what motivated them to come to college, and what organizations they are apart as well as what they have learned from their leadership roles. Some of the main lessons that they have learned include communication, organization, delegation, teamwork and responsibility. Some of my favorites included prioritizing, building relationships, learning about themselves, and having fun! From this presentation I was also able to see where all of our student leaders on campus come from besides the obvious things like clubs, peer mentors in learning communities, and tutors. Leadership roles can also be obtained through Greek life, religious groups, volunteer positions like Food at First and Habitat for Humanity, and through jobs on campus.
        Most of all, I think what I learned from these women was that uncertainty is okay. They admitted that there were many times that they really didn't know what to do so they just had to wing it. This was beneficial, even if it was a disaster at the time, because now they know what works and what doesn't work and how they will change things in the future. Additionally, I could also see how much they loved talking about their roles and organizations and I hope that that is what my students see next fall when I am their leader.
         My second session was much different as it wasn't a sit and listen type of thing. Many students had posters hanging up around the Gallery Room that you could look at and discuss with them. All of these posters were about certain "-isms"; I really enjoyed how they were just the common ones like racism or sexism, but ones that I hadn't really thought of like ageism and classism. I liked hearing each person's perspective on the topic and how they thought change could be made. This will be beneficial in dealing with the diversity of my students next fall because sometimes we fall into the habit of thinking that looks are what make people diverse when in reality it's their entire background that makes one person diverse from another.
        Overall, ISCORE was another great learning experience that I have gained resources and ideas on how to acknowledge diversity amongst a group of people.

A Little Bit of Everything

            Last Thursday, Matt and I led the discussion on Leading Groups Effectively, which I thought was a very informative chapter. Of all five practices of successful leaders, I think that modeling effective behavior is the most important. Your group members aren’t going to be excited and actively participate if you aren’t displaying that type of emotion. Additionally, they won’t respect you as much as a peer mentor if they know that you tell them how to deal with a problem, but won’t use that advice yourself. I would say that this practice is the one that I would be strongest at because I’m a firm believer in actions speak louder than words. The practice that I think will be the toughest for me is focusing goal direction. I truly want to help everyone in my group grow each class period, but it’s important to remember that each student will have different goals for the class and will be at different levels of understanding for different topics. Lastly, one of the main points that I got out of the lesson is the importance of evolving as a peer mentor as your group evolves. During the first few weeks of classes, we may have to be more in charge and leading discussions while towards the end of the semester, we should have less of the control and let discussions flow between the students.         
           Yesterday, Brooke and Sam did an excellent job at leading the problem solving and goals discussion despite having to be pushed back a couple of weeks. I really enjoyed flipping the negative statements into positive and SMART goals and hearing the ideas of others. I know that there are many times in my life where I’ve said things like, “I’m going to fail this test,” when instead I should be focusing on how I will positively approach the difficult situation and specifically state how I will approach and conquer it. This ability to flip situations into a positive light will be a great skill to have when dealing with students in the future so that they too can develop this skill and see that everything isn’t so bad after all!
           Finally, I once again really enjoyed the retreat. I think they are a great time to get to know each other better and have fun with all of the ice breakers. It’s always fun to see what each pair comes up with. A lot of people have already mentioned that they enjoyed Kayla’s ice breaker and I have to agree. I remember one of the qualifications to be a Hixson Scholar was to have had to  overcome extraordinary circumstances and it was interesting to see what some of those were. Typically, these things can be difficult and uncomfortable to talk about, but I feel as though the line activity makes it more quiet and comfortable, allowing people to share what they would like. I can definitely see myself using this in my section well into the semester after we all get to know each other so that we can continue to get to know each other at a deeper level.